According to Scott Gilbert, those words, usually uttered by me in a crowded movie theatre lobby, were my stairway to adolescent sex! Can't say I knew a girl who blew the WHOLE football team, but if I remember one I'll post her name and number here next week.
To my little brother, Barry, who turned 36 on Wednesday.
I'M LIKE A LEPRECHAUN, ONLY I'M NOT A DRUNK
Earlier this week, a magistrate in Portsmouth, England dismissed charges against a man accused of doing his weekly shopping while brandishing a sword. Merlin Michael Williams, 26, explained to the judge that he was a Druid. He also pointed out other cases that have appeared before the court that had been dismissed because Druids require their swords to cast spells and create circles of safety. The judge agreed and sent Williams on his way.
Sat down this week with director Steven Brill (Mr. Deeds, Little Nicky and the upcoming Without a Paddle). Some great stories about Disney greed (he created The Mighty Ducks), his friendship with Steven Soderbergh, and being a Gothamite in Batman Returns. Look for it soon in the PCR!
ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?
Earlier this year, Stephen King urged the readers of Entertainment Weekly to send in their favorite movie lines. This week, the magazine published the top 50. Actually, 51. According to King, the line most submitted was uttered by Mandy Patinkin in The Princess Bride. "My name is Indigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!" The top 10 were:
1. "I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender, I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it." Marlon Brando as Terry Malloy in On the Waterfront
2. "We all go a little mad sometimes." Anthony Perkins as Norman Bates in Psycho.
3. "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me." Dustin Hoffman as Benjamin Braddock in The Graduate.
4. "Hey, don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love." Woody Allen as Alvy Singer in Annie Hall.
5. "She's my daughter! She's my sister! She's my daughter! My sister, my daughter. She's my sister and my daughter!" Faye Dunaway as Evelyn Cross Mulwray in Chinatown.
6. "Open the pod bay doors, HAL" Keir Dullea as Dave Bowman in 2001: A Space Odyssey.
7. "Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!" Charlton Heston as Taylor in Planet of the Apes.
8. "Because when you're a call girl, you control it, that's why. Because someone wants you...and for an hour...I'm the best actress in the world." Jane Fonda as Bree Daniels in Klute.
9. "And I say, 'Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know. for the effort, you know.' And he says, 'Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on our deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.' So I got that goin' for me, which is nice." Bill Murray as Carl Spackler in Caddyshack.
10. "Hitler was better looking than Churchill, he was a better dresser than Churchill, he had more hair, he told funnier jokes, and he could dance the pants off of Churchill!" Kenneth Mars as Franz Leibkind in The Producers.
OK, not too bad. Of course, if I was going to use a line from Klute on someone, it would be "We could have a nice half and half for fifty!" But then again, Fonda DID win the Best Actress Oscar for her work so who am I to question it. Which brings us to:
Yes, I throw down the gauntlet to PCR writers and readers to submit their 10 favorite movie lines. They don't have to be classics (see #8 above - who in the hell says that?). That's right, YOU'RE favorite lines, published here next week. To quote Sylvester Stallone in "Rocky III," 'GO FOR IT!'
MEET THE BEATLES - PART 28
August 8, 1969 - While a friendly policeman helps block traffic, photographer Iain Macmillan climbs a step ladder in the middle of Abbey Road as the lads stride through the thick-lined crosswalk in front of the studio gate. They cross several times and six photos are taken. Later, Paul will pick the one he likes best for the cover of the "Abbey Road" album.
Well, that's all for now. Have a great week. See ya!
"Mike's Rant" is ©2004 by Michael A. Smith. Webpage design and all graphics herein are creations of Nolan B. Canova. All contents of Nolan's Pop Culture Review are ©2004 by Nolan B. Canova.