Hopefully I'm errant in the way that I simply MUST take exception with our editor for the title of the newest department in Pop Culture Review, SCHLOCKARAMA. Seems to me this is an obvious slight of one of the most underappreciated sci-fi classics of all time...1973's "SCHLOCK", which just so happens to be John Landis' directorial debut. I believe he wrote it and also donned the outfit for the Schlockthropus, who was a prehistoric apeman awaken from his million year slumber in present-day California.
Also important here is that the makeup master for this outlandish classic is none other than the great Academy Award winner Rick Baker, who we all know recently as the guy hosed by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for not getting nominated for "Planet of the Apes". I mean, come on, guys...not even a NOMINATION???? Somebody there needs to wake up and smell the java.
Schlock is loaded with puns and comedic references, is brilliantly directed, and has one of my all-time favorite movie scenes in which Schlock discovers a poster board of a massive Chiquita Banana and the music from Kubrick's 2001 plays in the background. CLASSIC. This has also just been released on DVD in widescreen, and yes, it is on its way to me!
(The reference to "schlock" films is far older than John Landis's excellent movie. His title was DERIVED from the term, not the reverse, AND is NOT meant as a slam (necessarily) by him OR by me. And to anyone else who misinterpreted the feature Will and I started: "Schlock" films are, defined by us, as low-budget "guilty pleasures" NOT "cheap shit, worthless crap". Those will be covered in a different section!---Nolan)
BRITTON CINEMA (REVISITED)
Some time back we were all lamenting on the demise of our favorite movie theaters. Discussed were such hallmarks of moviegoing as Hillsboro Theater (where I first saw "Jaws"), the Austin (which bit the dust MANY years ago), and Britton Cinema (where Mike and I escaped to from school everyday that the Jaws re-release was showing!) As Britton was also the first movie theater I ever went into, it was especially cruel to learn this bastian from my youth was gone........or was it?
I've just recently learned that the houseing area for the Theater complex in Britton Plaza is being revamped and will have ANOTHER "Grand Opening"! This is wonderful news for the little kid inside me that still recalls fondly the misadventures taken place in that vicinity. No trip to Britton would be complete without first stopping off at "Booknook" and visiting Nolan, and of course, swinging by again on the way home to discuss the film we just saw (which I always took as a way for Nolan to save money, being the cheapskate that we all know him to be!). That of course doesnt take away the fact that he's top notch in every other area. Naturally.
Could 'this' be the groundbreaking event that gets us all back together again? Let's face it, there can't possibly be another group of people that put as much money into the Britton as we did. Therefore, upon the great grand opening, would it not be perfect and chime in unison with a Hats Reunion?!?!? Hmmmmmmmm! I know "I" have plenty of time. How about you guys? That is if we can drag Corey off his high horse of Hollywood professionalism and return him to his Ida roots! Are you ready to rock? I know I am! Pass the Spaghetti!!
(It's not just Corey we have to worry about....HATS/Blade bassist Scott van Sickle is seriously planning on moving out of state later this year.---Nolan)
AND THE WINNER IS.........
I'm starting this column early Sunday, before the awards telecast, in an effort to bring upon myself an omen of victory. Will Mike win again? Will I finally prevail? And what of Naomi? Read on, and discover the exciting conclusion to "AS THE PCR TURNS".......
(Matt will return from his subterfuge as the awards commence).....
Well that didn't take long!!!! Ah,,,,the magic of the literary page. As for the Mike/Matt competition....it was VERY close, but alas, Mike remains supreme commander by 2 picks. Due to the fact that Mike and I agreed on quite a few this year, I will list only the ones each of us got correct over the other.
MIKE: BEST PICTURE(BEAUTIFUL MIND), BEST ACTRESS (HALLE BERRY), ADAPTED SCREENPLAY (BEAUTIFUL MIND), CINEMATOGRAPHY (LORD OF THE RINGS)
MATT: BEST ACTOR (DENZEL WASHINGTON), COSTUME DESIGN (MOULIN ROUGE).
The greatest moment? Gotta be Halle Berry, who you have to appreciate for being genuinely suprised. Must admit one reason I didn't vote for her is because I perceived her as fake. Guess I was wrong. Happily wrong. Also, kudos to Ron Howard who, even though it's hard not to imagine him as Opie or Richie Cunningham, has proven to be one of the great movie makers in the history of film....and I fervently beleive that. I would think Mike certainly would agree with that assessment.
Biggest suprise, and error, to me is "Momento" not winning for AT LEAST original screenplay. I mean, heck, the entire premise was original. The only possible reason for it NOT winning has to be lack of screen time, and most voters just didnt see it, which is a true shame.
All in all, it was a great telecast. And I actually did better with my picks than I think I ever have, which is also cool. But I digress.................Lest I forget what is most important..........
I am the Barney to Mike's Fred, the Norton to his Ralph, the Heaven's Gate to his Deer Hunter....you get the idea.
Congrats Mike, on another excellect moment of prophesy fullfilled.
Till next time, take care and God bless
Matt
SCHLOCK AND ROLL